Synastry of bad sex

Sure, Astrology can give us indications of great sex in synastry, but can it indicate bad sex, too? Here are some aspects which may indicate sexual incompatibility. Note: These aspects, on their own, do not necessarily indicate “bad sex”. Supportive aspects can negate these influences.

Mars square/opposite Mars:

In astrology, Mars represents our sexual style. When your Mars squares another person’s Mars, it indicates that your sexual styles are at odds. You express your sexuality in different ways, which can indicate sexual incompatibility. Squares cause friction, so it may be difficult to reconcile these sexual differences. Your body rhythms may not match well, which can result in disappointment for both of you. For example, Mars in Taurus natives enjoy natural, physical sexual expressions. They are not fond of spontaneity or variety when it comes to love-making. If a Mars in Taurus person partnered up with a Mars in Aquarius person, this may spell trouble. Mars in Aquarius intellectualizes sex, which may confuse the Mars in Taurus person. Mars in Aquarius seeks plenty of variety in sex, and tends to enjoy the “idea” of sex more than the act itself. This would obviously be a problem for sensual Mars in Taurus, who needs plenty of physical contact to be satisfied.  The opposition is not as problematic as the square, but the sexual differences remain.

Mars square Saturn:

Saturn is the planet of restriction and discipline, while Mars is the planet of sex and aggression. When these two planets collide in synastry, sexual problems may plague the couple. Saturn may block, hamper, or limit Mars’ sexuality. Saturn may feel disappointed with Mars’ performance in bed, generating anger and hostility between the couple. This can result in the decline of Mars’ self-confidence when it comes to sexual matters.

Mars square Uranus:

Hard aspects from Uranus to another person’s planets in synastry often indicate an on-off energy in regards to the planet involved. This aspect doesn’t necessarily indicate “bad” sex, but can indicate sudden shifts in sexual interest on the part of the Uranus person. At first, the sex is likely to be electric and fulfilling, but over time, the Uranus person may tire of the sex and seek excitement somewhere else.


Lets talk about what repulses us in a person. I have to start with Moons, as they are one’s deepest heart. I do not think Moon square Moon can sustain a long term relationship. If it does, it is lacking. It is sad. It is missing a piece.

Moon oppose Moon is fine in a platonic relationship. In fact, I think it is excellent in a platonic relationship because each person brings an opposite perspective. This is wonderful with friends. However, if one takes this to lovers, there will be an essential piece missing, in my opinion. When one partner cries, the other will not know how to comfort him. There is a lack of simpatico due to the opposite Moons.

One may give an opposite  perspective but one will not give true heart. The true heart resonates on a different spectrum. Hence, there is angst. Hence, there is sadness and loneliness.  I don’t think a wonderful relationship can exist with Moon square or Moon oppose Moon. Can a relationship endure? Of course. Will it fill your heart. To me, the answer is NO.

Sexuality is from the head up, not the neck  down. Attraction may be fleeting but if there is no soul, it soon  becomes empty. It becomes vapid. It becomes sad. Hence, if one has an attraction and nothing else, one will be left with a sense of angst as if one has eaten a big meal but found it to be  cardboard. Any relationship is based on soul. Without soul, there is no music. There is no beat. There is no anything but the sacharrine music that plays on elevators.

Let’s leave Moons, for the moment. However, one can never truly leave Moons because without Moon connections, there is not much of anything but we need to move on. The worst aspects for sexuality would be the worst aspects for simpatico. These would include one of the partnersshutting down the life passion/energy  of the other. This can be done in a number of ways. People can tear down the core of another. People can step on the love of another. People can diminish the shine of another. I will talk about all of these and how they erode relationships.

If one person’s Saturn squares another person’s Moon, the Saturn person may throw cold water on the sensitive feelings of the Moon person. We, all have sensitive feelings.  Even the toughest person hurts. Even the toughest person wants to be loved. Hence, when a Saturn is square a Moon, the Moon person feels as if he cannot measure up.  If you can imagine a father who chastises you when you get an A minus and not an A, that is how this aspect feels, in my opinion.

If a Saturn squares a Venus, one may feel as if one is not attractive enough. One may feel as if one is not pretty enough for the partner. The Saturn may transmit this message to the Venus person, without words, perhaps, but it will be transmitted. The Venus person may feel like she has to be perfect in order to be loved by the Saturn person. This hurts a great deal. I have been here, so can talk from personal experience. I am sure many of you have, too. Our topic is the worst aspects for sexuality. I think one can imagine that the above two aspects would put a terrible damper on passion. Hence, the worst aspects for sexuality are, always, the worst aspects. for simpatico.

I would be remiss if I did not talk about a nuclear sexuality. This would be Nessu/Deja. If one wants to hang from the light fixtures, one will do so with Nessus/Deja. One may go emotional and sexual  places one never thought one could. One may  touch feelings one never thought one could. However, will it last? My answer would be No. Is it worth it? My answer would be maybe.

I think Nessus/Deja relationships deepen you, as well as humble you. The most judgemental person  is the  one who has not been humbled. I have seen Nessus/Deja relationships take a proud person and put her in the dust. Hence, she does not judge the next person who comes along

Mars figures into sexuality. Mars is drive. For some Mars signs, another Mars sign will not work well. A Cancer Mars like me does not work with another Cancer Mars. Who would chase the other around the couch 😀  A Scorpio Mars is perfect for a Cancer Mars because he has get up and go. Also, a water sign would understand the workings of another water sign. Mars has to work well in the synastry for there to be attraction.

If there is a Mars square Mars or  a Mars oppose Mars, it may be too strident. If a Mars works well with a Sun, there can be a nice balance. For a Gemini Sun, an Aquarius Mars works well. Hence, we have an Air sun trine an Air Mars. There are many possible good placements for the Mars in synastry. In my real world examples( and the charts I have done), people seem to be attracted to the same Mars signs over and over.


11 thoughts on “Synastry of bad sex

  1. jennifer says:

    You have an excellent concept. This is very true for me. My husband’s mars in sagittarius makes a grand square in my chart, opposing my sun and jupiter (gemini), squaring saturn (pieces), squaring my pluto, mars and uranus (virgo) conjunction. I originally thought it would always keep things exciting but that was far from what happened. He is now repulsive to me, I can hardly be in the same room as him. It started with me being very disappointed in his sexual performance paired with him being away for long periods of time with his job I suppose the walls went up.

  2. Gracie says:

    I am with you on about half of it. I think Mars opposite Mars is some of the best sex you can have, personally. And as a Mars in Cancer, the only sign who can match my emotional intensity is another Mars in Cancer. Mars square Saturn I’ve had a few times, and it depends on the specific energies involved. I think if you got a Mars in Aries with that energy, they would hate it. But with my Mars in Cancer, I love the stamina it adds. You just have to be aware of the darker sides of it. But Saturn square Venus and Dejanira/Nessus is 100% correct. In fact, I think in the dust is an understatement. And moon opposite moon strictly platonic, absolutely.

    • Vanessa says:

      If you’re mars in Cancer, I think you might be surprised that there may be 1 other Mars placement that would match your emotions strongly. Mars in Scorpio is so all consuming, sensual, intense, and very compatible for your mars placement.

      Also agree strongly with you about Mars opposite Mars.
      In my experience, it works! (I’m Mars Virgo, and Mars Gemini creates chemistry, although my 5th house is also in Gemini which is prob part of the reason)

    • Lis Kay says:

      I totally agree with you. Great sex but no chemistry OUTSIDE of the bedroom. Lots of arguing and getting on each other’s nerves very easily. The other person’s breathing may annoy you. Lol.

  3. Gareth says:

    I’m interested in this. I’ve started a relationship with a woman and guess what: I’m Taurus Mars, she’s Aquarius Mars. However, I think the ‘incompatibility’ of this aspect is balnaced out by her Capricorn Venus trining my Mars, and her Piscena Moon sextile to it. Also, I have a Piscean Venus opposite Uranus in 12th house Virgo, so that, I presume brings rather a lot of the Aquarian energgies out. What I mean to say is that the sex is the best I’ve ever had. So… there we go; we really shouldn’t foucs too much on one tough aspect.

  4. Lis Kay says:

    I’m sorry but I respectfully disagree with the Mars square Mars bad sex. The two people I had the best sex with I had I had Mars square Mars with BOTH. IT could have been the Venus conjunct Mars, with one and Venus opposite Mars with the other and then a moon conjunct Venus with both guys. But I doubt it. I find I have little chemistry with Mars sextile Mars or trine Mars. So I’m looking at the soft aspects that supports endurance but little to no sparks in the bedroom. Although it all may depend on a person’s natal chart and what turns them on personally. Some like easy aspects some welcome challenging aspects 😏

  5. kotence777 says:

    I too disagree that mars square mars is no good sex. The best sex I had was with partners with their mars square mine. I had two ex boyfriends with this position. You have to see all the picture.

  6. specialK says:

    You have to look at house placement, midpoints and duads, not just the signs. I’m female w/ Mars in 8 Taurus in the 8th house opposite Scorpio Moon/Eros in 2nd. Mars in Aquarius is in my 5th house so I have a lot of friends with Aquarius Mars and get a huge buzz and crush energy from it but never a significant romantic relationship with that configuration. My VE/MA midpoint is 14Aqu/Leo so…someone’s Mars could technically be square but could land on my midpoint. However, it would also be squaring my Moon & Venus. Mars in Scorpio ends up being conjunct my Moon and Venus in my 2nd house so that’s a hot one even though it’s an opposition. For day-to-day compatibility, I tend to prefer Earth or Water Mars. (All my love planets are in earth or water.) Mars in earth trine my own or Taurus conj my own (it ends up in my 8th house.) Some of my closest girlfriends also have Mars in Taurus nearly identical or at lease conjunct my own. Weirdly, all 3 of them are my regular road trip/travel buddies – maybe something to do with physical compatibility/similar biorhythms??
    Mars is in my 8th and also ruler of my 8th so if no aspect to my Mars…no sexual relationship. My Mars is also closely trine, conj or opposite several love asteroids in my chart so it has stronger pull than Venus. 😉
    8 Taurus is Leo (duad) in 4th # (Cancer) so some of the best sex I’ve had is Cancer Mars (11 Cancer) Scorpio duad/ 5th # (Leo) which functions like Mars conj Venus & Mars conj Mars simultaneously and also trines my moon. Mars at 11 Cap (Taurus duad) is the mirror opposite. Anyone with Mars 17-19’59 degrees in most of the signs – particularly Aries because of the double Scorpio influence – I have Venus at 18 Scorp (Gem duad/8th# Scorpio.) Typically guys have Venus sextile Mars in Aries/Gemini between 17-19’59.) This also creates a VE/MA midpoint in Taurus directly opposes my Venus which lends really hot chemistry but not sure about compatibility. Aries is also my 7th house.
    The other Mars I attract quite regularly is in the very late degrees of Leo 22.5-25 (Taurus duad, #10 Capricorn) like a Mars/Mars conj and 25-27.5 Leo (Gemini duad) which is like a Mars/Venus conjunction (and also conjuncts my Lust asteroid.)
    Alternately, I’ve have a guy friend who has Mars around 14 Pisces which trines my Moon/Venus but effect is not nearly the same (because it’s fairly far away from my Mars, lands in my 6th house and is not in a duad that corresponds to my Venus or Mars.) It’s explains why a certain Mars/Venus might be in a closer trine to your planets but not affect you sexually. (Google Alice Portman “Calculating Duads and Dwad charts.”) The other part of puzzle is primary and secondary loves houses and aspects to rulers of those houses.

  7. Natulio says:

    What’s about Mars in partner’s 12th house?
    I’ve readed that the house person doesn’t recognize the mars person’s sexual desires or sexuality.

  8. annelise says:

    well we got mars in aquarius and mars in scorpio moon scorpio moon aquarius and both venus in aquarius …..Lol thats lovely

  9. Well, if Saturn is restriction and Mars action, how would a Saturn in sag square Mars in virgo play out? Would it not be easier for the virgo Mars to tolerate sag Saturn restrictions?? I mean, how can a sag Mars be restrictive??

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